How and Why Criticisms Affect Us

Updated: Dec 6, 2020

In order to deal with criticisms in a healthy way, you must first understand why it hurts when you hear painful remarks and how it can affect you. This is so because self-awareness is usually the first step in behavior modification.

The following are just some of the reasons why you get hurt after being criticized and how it could affect you.

How and Why Criticisms Affect Us
How and Why Criticisms Affect Us

1 Rejection Hurts

Rejection, especially from people important in our lives both on personal and professional level, can be quite hurtful. The fact that we consider them part of our world makes us vulnerable to getting affected when we hear seemingly hurtful comments.

And most of the time, it doesn't matter whether those comments are well-meant or personal in nature. The fact that criticisms have been uttered by people we perceive have great impact in our lives just make it more difficult to bear.

2 Criticisms Can Damage Your Self-esteem

As with any other negative things that could happen into one's life, negative feedback can make you feel worthless, especially if you are an emotionally fragile person.

Oftentimes, we just focus on the words, and fail to recognize its covert meaning. Getting our sense of self-worth injured makes our judgment somehow impaired. Because of this we fail to recognize whether the criticisms we receive are meant to help us make improvements (constructive criticisms) or are just plain rude and sarcastic personal attacks (destructive criticisms) that can just be ignored so you don't take it personally. Try to be less sensitive, therefore.

3 You Feel Like Your Self-control Is Being Put To A Test

Controlling yourself to rage after being criticized is indeed emotionally toilsome. You may feel like being taken advantaged of for not having the courage to speak up and explain yourself or you may feel like being provoked to explode in anger.

Either way, dealing with criticisms require self-awareness so you may understand whether those criticisms are true or irrational. From that point, you'd be able to move on to the next steps of dealing with criticisms.

4 Criticisms Can Make You Feel Being Denied Of A Chance To Become A Better Version of Yourself

If you feel guilty after being criticized, it could be because you somehow understand that there's some truth to it. You've probably accepted being responsible for a negative outcome that has happened.

This can make you feel heavy-hearted and after hearing criticisms, you might feel being denied of a chance to correct your mistakes-- most likely depending on the degree of the resultant adversities.

You see, when it comes to receiving criticisms, you shouldn't focus on the hurtful words. Rather you need to take it as a challenge. Change your perspectives and use it to become a better version of yourself.

Remember the adage:

"To err is human."

No one is exempted from failing, so it wouldn't be healthy to dwell too much on your mistakes. Look for ways to do something about your weaknesses and let time heal any wound caused by such failure.

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